Ask Zelda: Previous Questions 2 @ Zelda's World: Punk & Stuff

Q 40. I know this is a really boring question, but...What Osmond sang "Krazy Horses"? (knew you would love this question Zelda)
Name: Izzy...mmmm..sometimes....dizzy Location: Adrussan Age: usual age.... Sex: female Date: 27Aug2001

A 40. I've asked all the crazy people I know (it took me a while!) and it would appear to have been ALL of them. I do have a disturbing image in my head of loads of gleaming-toothed, grinning numpties giving it some in Elvis-style, big-collared, white jump suits. So that would fit then! I think they showed it on 'So Graham Norton' when Donny was on trying to restart his flagging career, but ultimately just getting the piss ripped out of him.

Q 39. Am I just an old fart then? (I didn't mean to tar all young kids with the same brush!)
Name: wiseoldwoman (again) Date: 26Aug2001

A 39. Nah, you just like to have your beer in the same place as you see the bands! Which is fair enough.

Q 38. We have been to a lot of gigs this year where there have been underagers - do you think this should be allowed? Or is it just me, cause they spoil my day by - well behaving like children!
Name: wiseoldwoman Location: Scotland Age: immaterial? Sex: female Date: 25Aug2001

A 38. Yes, we have wiseoldwoman. I guess it should be allowed, as many of the under-agers are more obviously enthusiastic and it's good for the bands to see a positive reaction. But I have noticed that when it's all ages the under 12's behave better than some of the teenagers, who do tend to run about like children and can be very annoying. Some people are immature regardless of their age and some people are just plain annoying! It's a fact of life, not just all age shows, "But they don't bother me at all, cuz I know quite well when their lives are over and they've done what they've done, they're the people that are going to hell".

Q 37. Do serial killers use "pale blueish mingin" VW van's aswell? soon to be bright dashing colours? OK I know it's a keich question, but I'm not that bright...senile a wee bit.
Name: Nelly big drawers Location: Adrussen kinda Age: a young lookin' 105yr old Sex: female Date: 20Aug2001

A 37. Well the cheapskate, psychedelic kind certainly would.

Q 36. What is the car of choice of serial killers?
Name: Nelly big drawers Location: Adrussen Age: I look 90, but I'm really 105 Sex: female Date: 17Aug2001

A 36. What makes you think I would know a crazy thing like that? pssst! It's a VW camper van with orange being the most popular colour choice, but don't tell anyone I told you.

Q 35. Is my dress made yet?
Name: Kaz Location: her to eternity Age: old fart Sex: female Date: 16Aug2001

A 35. Erm, well, you know, busy life and stuff...okay, I'm Zelda and I'm a lazy sod. Like half of this site, it's 'coming soon'. It'll be with you before your ears stop ringing after Extreme, dude!

Q 34. Tom threw Tim three thumbtacks,three thumbtacks were thrown to Tim by Tom. Why did Tom throw Tim three Thumbtacks?
Name: "that woman again" Location: Condorrat, Cumbernauld actually Age: ok "I'm gngklnkllo" Sex: female (last time I looked) Date: 15Aug2001

A 34.
That woudth be becauthhhhh Tom isth a pure bathstardth...

Q 33. What is the most enjoyable gig you've been at this year/last 5 years/ever?
Name: Kaz Location: ankh morpork Age: going grey Sex: female Date: 28Jul2001

A 33. This year I'd have to say the Hey Suburbia Festival at the Engine Room in Falkirk. It was my birthday, it was a change from Glasgow, it was well organised, seeing 6 bands that I'd never seen before, and seeing Turtlehead again as I really like them now. Pennywise at the SECC just misses out because it was at the SECC as part of Deconstruction and it's a crap venue.
Last 5 years, possibly Pennywise at the Astoria in London, partly just for the whole trip (I won a trip to London to see Pennywise!), but meeting Jim and the guys after the show was excellent too. Also the Fat Wreck Tour in '98 with Lagwagon, NUFAN, Swingin' Utters and especially Strung Out. I think the first time you see any band that you really like at the time is way cool.
And of all time, I think every Ramones show I've ever been to. Especially the first because you know they're fast, but you just don't realise how fast and relentlessly they play live, it leaves you breathless.

Q 32. Who are your current top 5 fave bands?
Name: Kaz Location: Bonnie Scotland Age: 33 and more than a bit Sex: female Date: 28Jul2001

A 32. Dead Kennedys and Ramones are my all time faves, but bands that are still around; Pennywise, Rancid, Turtlehead, Strung Out and The Distillers.
And if Rancid could get their collective asses up to Glasgow I'd have the pleasure of seeing them all this year!

Q 31. Congratulations to Ruby and Greig, where's the party?
Name: mmm! Izzy I think? (it's too early in the morning) Location: Ayrshire mmm! somewhere (all these questions on a Saturday morning) Age: 95yrs Sex: dog (according to him) Date: 07Jul2001

A 31. At Izzy's, Saturday night at 8pm. ; )

Q 30. I watched 'There's Only One Madonna' last nite and (I think) I spotted Luka (ER man) in one of her videos, playing chess with her. Was it really him?
Name: Kaz Location: another planet baby Age: a wee bit older than you Sex: yes,thanks Date: 05Jul2001

A 30. Well according to a very reliable source (Zelda's Madonna knowledge = 0) he was in her video for "The Power Of Goodbye". Seems the queen of pop handpicked him and I don't think it was for his chess skills, if you know what I'm saying, Kaz!

Q 29. Where should I go on holiday?
Name: Kaz Location: Scotland Age: 28 and 68 months (Copyright Linda Lee) Sex: female Date: 05Jul2001

A 29. If I had the money, the right company etc. etc., I'd go for a frantic week each to New York, San Francisco and New Orleans, then chill out in the hills of Italy, preferably by a lake with a glass of Asti in my hand. Ahhhh...... Or you could always go camping up the country.

Q 28. Plutarch (46-120AD) advised not to have sex in the morning because there may still be ill-digested food in the stomach- all the superfluities have not yet been evacuated through the urine and faeces.Do you agree or is it un sac du merd?
Name: Garth the Gorilla Location: West of Scotland Age: 35 Sex: unsure? Date: 26Jun2001

A 28. Well they were very different days, with huge banquets in the evenings, and everyone full of superfluities in the morning. According to my medical research though, infection inducing germs are lurking at all times of the day or night, so scrupulous personal hygiene is recommended after sex. I reckon as long as you don't actually have sex in great sacs du merd, then you should be quite safe, Mr Gorilla.

Q 27. Is the geek guy in the Wonder Years Marilyn Manson?
Name: Gally Location: Thecoatofsalt Age: oldenoughtoknowbetter Sex: male Date: 15Jun2001

A 27. Much as it would be nice to think that all geeky kids grow up and become famous, satanic freakshows, unfortunately in this case it appears to be just a cruel rumour.
As the actor in question says himself, "What would you rather have, people thinking you're a dorky kid from The Wonder Years or a satanic rock star?" Indeed.

Q 26. Zelda, I'm trying to download a web design disc to PC, keep getting error; glass files would not download? Help
Name: Solstice Child Location: Ardrossan Age: mmmmmmm! er!!!!! well!! Sex: female Date: 06Jun2001

A 26. Bloody computers, eh? So the glass files will not download, now this could be for several reasons 1. The files are corrupt 2. The disc is corrupt 3. Your computer is corrupt 4. Nothing is corrupt, it's just messing with your head and you probably don't even need the glass files!

Q 25. Where can I get a St. Pauli hooded top in Glasgow? Failing there where in the UK????!!!
Name: Andy Location: Glasgow Age: old Sex: male Date: 03Jun2001

A 25. Unfortunately, football is not stuff that Zelda knows much about and I have been unable to find anywhere that sells such an item in the UK.
Maybe the actual club or associated supporters clubs could help you out? There are quite a few sites on the web and I'm sure if you contacted someone from them, they could be more helpful.
Anyway, good luck! I've heard they've got a pretty cool strip, you know, for a football team!

Q 24. Do you know any wicked spells Zelda, that would work on Trolls?
Name: Solstice Child Location: mmm! Ardrossan? Age: ah! well, now! em, ????? Sex: female Date: 03Jun2001

A 24. Trolls are notorious for being mischievious but, alas, sometimes they do go over to the dark side. When this happens they can wreak havoc. You've come to the right place, as I know several voodoo curses that just may work. All I need is something personal from said troll; nail clippings, strand of hair, that type of thing, or a photograph would work too.

Q 23. I've just read Zelda's little message about The Ramones. As we all probably know by now, Joey Ramone died last week. I just wanted to ask what was your all-time favourite Ramones song? Mine is Blitzkrieg Bop.
Name: Kevin Location: Coventry Age: 20 (21 in 3 weeks) Sex: male Date: 21Apr2001

A 23. There's just too many to pick one, although I might've opted for Blitzkrieg Bop myself if you hadn't gotten there first! Every one's a classic; short and fast songs about bubblegum love stuff, teen angst mixed with sick humour and horror. OK I'll give you "onetwothreefour" : Blitzkrieg Bop, Teenage Lobotomy, I Wanna Be Sedated, The Return of Jackie and Judy, Psycho Therapy, Bonzo (I know, it's called "My Brain Is Hanging Upside Down"), Wart... OK enough already! I could give you four a day!

Q 22. What do you think will win the Grand National this Saturday??
Name: Ricky Location: Saltcoats Age: older than I was Sex: male Date: 04Apr2001

A 22. Ah, I think you're confusing me with "Psychic Zelda" who's four www dot's over. But my guess would be a horse.
I always feel sorry for the intelligent horses who have the good sense to ditch that monkey on their backs and go for the finish line. You can see the superior look on their faces when they cross the line. But they never get the prize.

Q 21. I'm going to be so bored when I'm at home. Do you have any remedies for boredom? And what does Zelda do when she is bored? or is it a simple case of updating this site when such an occasion arises.
Name: Kevin Location: Coventry Age: 20 Sex: male Date: 30Mar2001

A 21. I'm not really prone to boredom myself. I'm either busy or sleeping! So get busy doing something you like or just go to sleep. Or alphabetise your CDs.

Q 39.	Am I just an old fart then? (I didn't mean to tar all young kids with the same brush!) Name: wiseoldwoman (again) Date: 26Aug2001
A 39.	Nah, you just like to have your beer in the same place as you see the bands! Which is fair enough.

Q 37.	Do serial killers use "pale blueish mingin" VW van's aswell? soon to be bright dashing colours? OK I know it's a keich question, but I'm not that bright...senile a wee bit. Name: Nelly big drawers Location: Adrussen kinda Age: a young lookin' 105yr old Sex: female Date: 20Aug2001
A 37.	Well the cheapskate, psychedelic kind certainly would.

Q 36.	What is the car of choice of serial killers? Name: Nelly big drawers Location: Adrussen Age: I look 90, but I'm really 105 Sex: female Date: 17Aug2001
A 36.	What makes you think I would know a crazy thing like that? pssst! It's a VW camper van with orange being the most popular colour choice, but don't tell anyone I told you.

Q 35.	Is my dress made yet? Name: Kaz Location: her to eternity Age: old fart Sex: female Date: 16Aug2001
A 35.	Erm, well, you know, busy life and stuff...okay, I'm Zelda and I'm a lazy sod. Like half of this site, it's 'coming soon'. It'll be with you before your ears stop ringing after Extreme, dude!

Q 34.	Tom threw Tim three thumbtacks,three thumbtacks were thrown to Tim by Tom. Why did Tom throw Tim three Thumbtacks? Name: "that woman again" Location: Condorrat, Cumbernauld actually Age: ok "I'm gngklnkllo" Sex: female (last time I looked) Date: 15Aug2001
A 34.	That woudth be becauthhhhh Tom isth a pure bathstardth...

Q 32.	Who are your current top 5 fave bands? Name: Kaz Location: Bonnie Scotland Age: 33 and more than a bit Sex: female Date: 28Jul2001
A 32.	Dead Kennedys and Ramones are my all time faves, but bands that are still around; Pennywise, Rancid, Turtlehead, Strung Out and The Distillers. And if Rancid could get their collective asses up to Glasgow I'd have the pleasure of seeing them all this year!

Q 31.	Congratulations to Ruby and Greig, where's the party? Name: mmm! Izzy I think? (it's too early in the morning) Location: Ayrshire mmm! somewhere (all these questions on a Saturday morning) Age: 95yrs Sex: dog (according to him) Date: 07Jul2001
A 31.	At Izzy's, Saturday night at 8pm. ; )

Q 30.	I watched 'There's Only One Madonna' last nite and (I think) I spotted Luka (ER man) in one of her videos, playing chess with her. Was it really him? Name: Kaz Location: another planet baby Age: a wee bit older than you Sex: yes,thanks Date: 05Jul2001
A 30.	Well according to a very reliable source (Zelda's Madonna knowledge = 0) he was in her video for "The Power Of Goodbye". Seems the queen of pop handpicked him and I don't think it was for his chess skills, if you know what I'm saying, Kaz!

Q 29.	Where should I go on holiday? Name: Kaz Location: Scotland Age: 28 and 68 months (Copyright Linda Lee) Sex: female Date: 05Jul2001
A 29.	If I had the money, the right company etc. etc., I'd go for a frantic week each to New York, San Francisco and New Orleans, then chill out in the hills of Italy, preferably by a lake with a glass of Asti in my hand. Ahhhh...... Or you could always go camping up the country.

Q 27.	Is the geek guy in the Wonder Years Marilyn Manson? Name: Gally Location: Thecoatofsalt Age: oldenoughtoknowbetter Sex: male Date: 15Jun2001
A 27.	Much as it would be nice to think that all geeky kids grow up and become famous, satanic freakshows, unfortunately in this case it appears to be just a cruel rumour. As the actor in question says himself, "What would you rather have, people thinking you're a dorky kid from The Wonder Years or a satanic rock star?" Indeed.

Q 26.	Zelda, I'm trying to download a web design disc to PC, keep getting error; glass files would not download? Help Name: Solstice Child Location: Ardrossan Age: mmmmmmm! er!!!!! well!! Sex: female Date: 06Jun2001
A 26.	Bloody computers, eh? So the glass files will not download, now this could be for several reasons 1. The files are corrupt 2. The disc is corrupt 3. Your computer is corrupt 4. Nothing is corrupt, it's just messing with your head and you probably don't even need the glass files!

Q 24.	Do you know any wicked spells Zelda, that would work on Trolls? Name: Solstice Child Location: mmm! Ardrossan? Age: ah! well, now! em, ????? Sex: female Date: 03Jun2001
A 24.	Trolls are notorious for being mischievious but, alas, sometimes they do go over to the dark side. When this happens they can wreak havoc. You've come to the right place, as I know several voodoo curses that just may work. All I need is something personal from said troll; nail clippings, strand of hair, that type of thing, or a photograph would work too.

Q 22.	What do you think will win the Grand National this Saturday?? Name: Ricky Location: Saltcoats Age: older than I was Sex: male Date: 04Apr2001
A 22.	Ah, I think you're confusing me with "Psychic Zelda" who's four www dot's over. But my guess would be a horse. I always feel sorry for the intelligent horses who have the good sense to ditch that monkey on their backs and go for the finish line. You can see the superior look on their faces when they cross the line. But they never get the prize.

Q 21.	I'm going to be so bored when I'm at home. Do you have any remedies for boredom? And what does Zelda do when she is bored? or is it a simple case of updating this site when such an occasion arises. Name: Kevin Location: Coventry Age: 20 Sex: male Date: 30Mar2001
A 21.	I'm not really prone to boredom myself. I'm either busy or sleeping! So get busy doing something you like or just go to sleep. Or alphabetise your CDs.